"In attempt to curb the impacts of the current financial crises, a benign bacteria that generates ascetism will be released in this sector. If a member of your family disappears contact the local police and your loved one ill be localized by means of aerial bacterial scans."
"African and south Asian genes are released in this area in attempt to curb the rise of xenophobia. Do not be alarmed if you or a member of your family wakes up with a very dark complexion, appearances will be normalized within 3-4 months."
"Psychologists have decreed that Bill Gates could be the product of Alan Greenspan daydreaming. As of noon tomorrow CET all Microsoft operating systems will stop being functional. Install alternative software immediately to avoid any inconvenience."
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